On the road again, Vol. II
I hear skateboards outside the window. I smell … um … organic cigarettes in the air. I see three dogs, curled up and half-attentively licking themselves. The strains of “Sister Christian” pipe through my MacBook’s tinny speakers, due to the universe’s infinite wisdom, an eclectic taste in music, and the omniscient Shuffle feature.
But where, exactly, am I?
Am I sipping champagne at the top of the world’s longest tramway, watching the sun set …
… sitting at a backyard party in Santa Fe, very cautiously enraptured by fire dancers?
… being hailed on at Elevation: 12,800 Feet in northern New Mexico …
… playing Gandalf in the Colorado Rockies (say it with me now: “YOU SHALL NOT PASS!”)…
… being caught off-guard – in a non-hospital-visit-causing way – by the most reality-shattering rocks I’ve ever seen …
… staring at the northern Utah sky, darkening over the bluest lake I’ve ever seen …
… discovering that, holy crap, Idaho’s national forests aren’t fucking around …
… finding the perfect travel companion – in Boise, of all places …
… snorting gin and tonics out my nose during Eddie Izzard’s performance in Denver …
… swimming in a multi-hued waterfall pool that ought to have WARNING: SO GODDAMN COLD stenciled somewhere on it …
… being spoon-fed the obvious …
… learning what the hell “hoodoos” are, and then repeating the word out loud for several consecutive minutes …
… camping illegally on the North Rim of the Grand Canyon …
… climbing to the center of an Arizona “vortex” in a rainstorm …
… getting the worst rope burn in the history of pain …
… experiencing the feeling of goosebumps as my eyes take in the panoramic Pacific Ocean – and the feeling of actual geese pecking my skin off as my mouth takes in the very same water …
… winding my way up the Pacific Coast Highway, paying more attention to the scenery than the gas gauge …
… having the immortal shit scared out of me by San Francisco streets …
… being lulled to sleep by Italian bagpipes and the internal heaviness that can only be achieved with the help of expertly-made tamales …
… spending a night underneath trees tall enough to give me vertigo …
… being blown away by the tango in Buenos Aires …
… finally finding a place to rest my head, plant my feet, gather my thoughts, and eventually wash my blood-, sweat- and dirt-encrusted clothes?
Yep.
Hello from Portland, Oregon. I think we might hang out here for a while – much like you have, if you’re still reading this. Thanks for that, by the way … I realize I have been a non-writing doucheface.
Because of the aforementioned douchefacery, as well as other factors including ahem memory loss, there is no possible way I can recap three months’ worth of travels in one single blog. But because of my awareness of the douchefacery, I am going to take my next six months and devote them primarily to collecting unemployment while recapping pretty much everything I can think of.
Oh, but before I go ahead and hop on that Ambition Train:
Thank you to Andria for letting me drink lots of wine on her couch before passing out on it,
to Miss Violet White for buying me beer over the phone,
to Barb for pointing me toward northern California,
to fifi for actually taking the time to look at practically every one of my hundreds of road trip photos (a.k.a. Obsessive Documentation),
to Vicki and her fully excellent family, for driving two hours from Colorado to Utah to go to the beach with me,
and to you, for being so motherfucking attentive. Seriously – I wouldn’t even be surprised if you could hear the skateboards … smell the grass … see the dog fur everywhere … hear guitar riffs … and taste my sweet, sweet freedom.
You’re living our dream girlfriend
We’ll be doing the big U.S road trip in about 12 years time! (our freedom comes when the kids leave home) And we can’t wait! Until then, We’ll have to make do with living vicariously through you! Sad but True.
Rock On \m/
Arohanui. N.Z
Kim
September 24, 2008 at 1:25 pm
That’s one helluva trip, Meany girl! I’m impressed…and jealous. I’ve been to quite a few of those places, but still nice to see them again, plus seeing the ones where I haven’t been. If you return by the northern route (although why would you, especially if it’s winter-time), you have a place to hang in Detroit – it’s not Bryce, New Mexico, or San Francisco, but it’s not all bad.
Kathleen
September 24, 2008 at 1:48 pm
I’m so happy for you! Love the pictures, and like Kathleen says, you’ve got a place to stay if you want to come even farther north in Michigan…
Sara
September 24, 2008 at 3:17 pm
I’ve enjoyed seeing your photos as you’ve posted them. Looks like you had a marvelous time – you certainly deserved it!
freshhell
September 24, 2008 at 3:49 pm
FINALLY! I’m mostly excited about your little traveling companion. Yay for him/her (name?). And I can’t believe you didn’t notify me when you drove through Eugene. :OP More, please!
shoshana
September 24, 2008 at 4:59 pm
you are my ultimate hero.
dom
September 24, 2008 at 5:18 pm
You guys are the shizzle to my nizzle. If I am able, when I am in your particular towns, to remember that you do in fact live there, I will totally be in touch.
Shoshana: I’m living in Portland, and Eugene is only two hours south – I’m sure I’ll come through to explore your town sooner or later. Anyway, practically every one of my Portland friends and their respective mothers have told me they’d be down for it any time!
ferocitymill
September 24, 2008 at 6:52 pm
Oh, and his name is Bones – more back-story on that later!
ferocitymill
September 24, 2008 at 8:33 pm
Beautiful pics… I think I scrolled through a majority of them on Flickr. Where in PDX are you staying (happens to be where I live…. )?
oregoncoastgirl
September 24, 2008 at 10:02 pm
Oh, if you think I’m going to be impressed by your incredibly beautiful photos of your cross-country (and Argentina even!) adventure and all the fun you’re having with Bones, you’re wrong. WRONG!!
Andria
September 25, 2008 at 1:54 am
It was great meeting you and your friends…… i was glad we could be your slow down and chill out day.
Good to finally hear from you again!
Vicki
September 25, 2008 at 9:52 pm
Glad you’re alive and well! It looks like you had some adventures!
I hope you’re well
Nathan
September 27, 2008 at 1:29 am
Thanks for taking me on the vacation I’ve never been able to go on and not making me get on a plane. I have been living vicariously through your flickr photos, my dear. Give Bones a scritch on the head. I’m totally in love. Hope to meet him someday.
awittykitty
September 27, 2008 at 7:07 am
i’d take your commentary, along with the photos, and make a book out of THAT.
make a snappy title, and you’d be in pictchas!
no kidding. the randomness of road trips are a story all by themselves. plus, the photos kick ass, and make you want to go there.
and, Portland is a good place to be either the start of the end of your road.
Ska "T"
September 28, 2008 at 1:30 am
This brings back sweet, sweet memories of the Great Fletcher CaliQuest of ‘97 (Montreal to Canada and back in three weeks). Glad to see you had a similar adventure of your own, thanks for the fantastic pictures (particularly the one of Eddie — we saw his show in Dallas and he’s now my emergency backup husband), and have a damn good time in Portland.
Melanie
September 28, 2008 at 9:10 pm
How utterly fantastic. I am so jealous of you. How I wish I could take off on an adventure of such proportions. I’m glad you had a wonderful time. Thanks for sharing those beautiful photos. I love the way you presented them. Oh…and thanks for the inspiration. SOME day I’m gonna do some crazy shit. SOME DAYYYyyy…
Seacreature
September 29, 2008 at 9:59 pm
Welcome back to the rain coast, Doucheface. Our eyes got sore waiting to catch sight of you.
Linda
September 29, 2008 at 10:29 pm
Whew! I was getting worried. We were about to organize a Search and Rescue party! Glad you’re still well!
Nanc'
October 1, 2008 at 8:01 pm
and just when I figured we’d never hear from you again…
I’m glad you’re alright and I’m glad you having such a good time! (and I’m jealous…)
Strange(from Xanga)
October 2, 2008 at 9:17 pm
Does this mean you won’t be coming through NC? Cuz NGD and I miss you. I’d totally make jello shots for you, too.
warcrygirl
October 7, 2008 at 1:47 am
XOXO! Thinking of you, miss, and wishing you well.
Violet
October 8, 2008 at 2:45 am
And hallo again! its been a long time Miss! but here you are again blogging like never before and i cant wait to read more, i will however miss your xanga.. ahh well change is good right? a little adventure and danger along the way lets you know youre alive.. looks like your adventures have been wonderful! be glad you didnt come to Southern Arizona.. it was hellish this summer. still is really. gross!
Amber
November 4, 2008 at 9:14 am
Good to see you back, lady. Looks like you are doing well! I have travelled those same roads the Summer I was 20 years old with a short German friend named Helga and a 1980 Toyota Carolla that leaked oil and died in Grand Junction Colorado after almost 6,500 miles of abuse. If you can make it up to Seattle, it’s a great city. If you can make it up to Montana it’s totally worth it as well.
candi Summers
November 11, 2008 at 7:20 pm
My son just enlisted. He heads for boot camp on Dec. 30th
karen
November 14, 2008 at 11:35 pm
Please update!!!! I can’t wait to read what comes next!
Lurker
December 1, 2008 at 4:37 am
Hi there!
Good to see you enjoying life! You are a great writer and photographer. I haven’t enchanged emails with you since the schmarmy! Take care of youself. Can’t wait for the next update;)
mia
December 1, 2008 at 9:43 am