Ferocity Mill

As it turns out, life never has to stop being a sporadically-marked trail through the forest (that is, an epic adventure), even when you attempt to follow the “rules.” I went back to school in August, thinking that all my free time would be gone, gone, gone, and that I’d have to live the life of a studious agoraphobiac, dropping off the face of the earth the way all my friends did when they were in school. Instead I discovered that all it takes is the tiniest bit of effort to fit a healthy regimen of traveling and parties into a well-packed academic- and volunteer-intensive  schedule.

Over the past four months, I have spent a considerable amount of time traipsing around California with Eric, with a few breaks to go to Washington, Oregon, Colorado, Florida, Jamaica, Grand Cayman and New York (twice). His band’s touring schedule has sort of become my vacation schedule, you see, as long as the transportation costs fit into my budget (I usually make them fit, using my expert Tetris skills). For example, if Eric’s band is booked to play a cruise, all I have to do is get myself to the port, and voila! I am on a free cruise (my first cruise ever, by the way – it sort of blew my mind). Isn’t it great how that works? So that’s why I haven’t been around so much – life keeps distracting me.

Perhaps it’s time for a bit of catch-up, since there have actually been a few major happenings since mid-September. Pardon me if I veer off into List Mode, but that’s really the only way I can keep things straight.

Happening #1 – Divorce
My divorce from Ex-Husband is now final, after only two and a half years of “separation.” It was actually more like three years of separation, because we hadn’t lived together since September 2006, before my second deployment to Iraq. I didn’t feel like bothering with all that paperwork for a while, especially while I was on the road more often than not, but when Eric and I started dating, I figured it was time to get that divorce. It’s slightly awkward explaining to your boyfriend’s mother that, heh heh, I’m sort of still married. Now that’s all taken care of, and Ex-Husband was perfectly civil and cooperative about the whole thing. On a related note, did you realize that in order to obtain a completely mutual, amicable, no-fuss divorce in the state of California, it costs three hundred and fifty dollars? It only cost us TEN DOLLARS to get a marriage license, folks. I’m just saying, that’s less than what you pay for an oil change. But all joking aside, I am now happily divorced, just in time for …

Happening #2 – Engagement
In early November, a few days before my divorce was final, Eric surprised both of us by proposing that we “make it official.” He then got down on his knee and asked again, using the slightly more romantic (and traditional) phrasing, “Will you marry me?” to which I responded, “Of course!” and that settled that. We have been enjoying a ridiculously happy relationship for just over a year now, and see no reason why we shouldn’t continue indefinitely. Since neither of us have the money for a wedding at the moment, though, or the energy to plan one, we’re planning to bask in the glow of engagement bliss at least until this fall. I would invite all of you to the wedding, but as it turns out, we will probably have to incur a small amount of debt just to get all of our families and close friends drunk. If any of you have any suggestions about how to throw a cheap wedding/reception, please come forth with them! We’re open to just about anything, including Mexico and any other countries with a cheap currency exchange rate.

This is where we got engaged. Doesn’t suck, right?

Happening #3 – Goats
Did I forget to mention that we had goats for three months? We kept them in our backyard and called them our kids (because that’s what they were, har!). I never intended to be a caretaker of goats, but a friend of Eric’s had a couple of ‘em who needed a temporary home, and as we have a sizable, slope-y backyard, we stepped up to the plate.

So, as it happens, you know what totally destroys all the weeds and extra shrubbery in a sizable, slope-y backyard? Goats. Goats and nothing else. We had been experimenting with weed-whackers and other loud, ferocious pieces of gardening equipment for a number of months, and nothing – nothing - had worked to get rid of the jungle in the backyard. The goats took care of it in about seven minutes. I highly recommend this solution to anyone who has a friend with a couple of goats and an unruly yard.

We also invented a new game called “Chase the Goats,” which involved pursuing the goats around their pen as they let out wild bleats and pranced around like nancies. We played this game sober, believe it or not. Don’t judge us.

This is The Goats. Their names are Grandma and Pegasus, and they want to eat your garden.

Happening#3 – Traveling, Traveling, Traveling
As I mentioned before, late fall and early winter have been chock full of destinations. We’ve traveled by land, air and sea to five states, one foreign country and one British Overseas Territory, not to mention all of the in-state adventuring we’ve packed in. We managed to visit all of our immediate family members on both coasts, spend Thanksgiving in both Washington and California (thank you, Southwest Airlines, for the $60 flights!), have weekends in a yurt in Santa Cruz and a mansion in San Francisco, celebrate Halloween in Yosemite and New Year’s Eve in Denver, sip domestic Red Stripe in Jamaica and locally-brewed Mirror Pond Pale Ale in Portland, hike in the Adirondacks and have our collective breath taken away by Jackson Pollock’s paintings in New York’s MOMA. Needless to say, I’ve gotten really good at the whole packing/unpacking thing, but Eric and I still manage to lose at least one belonging in each place we visit. At the moment, I’m waiting to get my bikini back from Fort Lauderdale, and he’s mourning the loss of his ski jacket on a plane somewhere between Denver and Orlando.

Our next destination is Albuquerque, where we’ll be driving this weekend, so I can attend an event held by this esteemed organization. As you may know, the military prohibits active-duty soldiers from speaking or acting out against the war in Iraq, which was a major reason for my keeping an anonymous blog during my deployments. Now that I’m out of the Army, I’m free to do and say whatever I please once again, and getting involved with IVAW is one way for me to stretch out my Constitutionally-protected free-speech muscles. Plus, I just love a good road trip.

Happening #4: School
Since it appears that no matter how much experience I have as an actual journalist, I still don’t have a chance of getting a job without a degree, I’ve been cautiously re-entering the world of academia, one baby step at a time. My aim is to get my BA in English or journalism, then enter a credential program and work toward becoming a teacher of English and/or journalism, so I decided to start slow with two courses introducing me to the field of education, and then ease myself into full-time classes in spring semester. Spring semester starts next week, so I’ll have to see how successful my “baby steps” plan ends up being. Hopefully I won’t end up fleeing any classes in a cold sweat, overwhelmed by the sheer numbers of eighteen-year-olds I’ll be dealing with on a semi-daily basis. Shudder.

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Now that we’re mostly caught up, I should let you know that one of my New Year’s resolutions was to Write More. So I will end this somewhat optimistically: See you tomorrow!

P.S. Yes, Linda, your peer pressure worked … sometimes a girl just needs a little flame under her ass.